Small.....

Sometimes in life circumstances make you contemplate- "Am I really worth any good?". You feel shallow and small in front of those who have the courage to lay down their lives for others without any expectation of an incentive (money, publicity, so on and so forth.........).

Since the past few days, I have also been undergoing the same thought process.

Mumbai was held hostage by terrorists. Many innocent people lost their life. Politicians played the blame game. Media exhibited courage and sensibility. Commandos fought valiantly to bring the situation under control. Two of them lost their lives along with 14 policeman. Their children lost their father. Their mothers lost their sons. Their wives lost their husbands. While I followed news like I had never done before..........

As events unfolded...hotels burnt...death toll rose... I felt shocked and angry. But not too sad.

Why? I don't know.

But every time I heard of a policeman or a commando laying down his life- I had goose pimples. My heart sunk. My eyes were moist. And I felt small. I might me making more money than them. I might be leading my life in much more comfort than them. But still their life has been more worthwhile than mine. I aspire for the kind of courage these martyrs had. And salute the valour with which they sacrificed their lives for the safety of a nation which in all likelihood will forget them in a matter of months.

Shaheedon ke mazaaron par har baras lagenge mele...vatan pe mitno walon ka yahi baaki nishaan hoga.....

The 35 things I miss about you.....Bengaluru

It has been more than a month since I shifted to Mumbai and my schedule has been totally crazy over this period. I owe this craziness greatly to two factors. First, the entire "Change Management" thing associated with any move and second, to my childhood habit of not managing my time very well.

However, this blog is not meant to discuss any of the above. Below, are a few things which I really really miss about the city (and its people) I have been in love with for nearly three years- Namma Bengaluru.

• Zipping through town on my KA-51H-8497 with M for company
• Being always prepared to pick up a fight with the Auto-Waalas
• The awesome food cooked by Ramesh Ji (my cook)
• BTM layout
• Watching movies on a high with Raaja at PVR- with both of us wearing dark sunglasses
• Ankur and mine "Kaa Dealing?" greetings
• Tiger's "Budgeddddddddd" right in front of Mc' donalds
• My bakchodis with Baizzy which only both of us could comprehend
• The natkhat KK
• "Just Live life...Kingsize" naarabaazi with Thakur and Preeti
• Working with a team of really wonderful people in the Platform team
• Vivek calling me the "Information Superhighway"
• The prestigious backend teams "Together we can and we will...." motto
• Pulling Cheeku's leg day in and day out
• Singing "Barsaat ke mausam main..tanhai ke aalam main" with Rahul Sharma
• Hitting Charsi's bachelor pad at odd hours, after all the parties were over
• The Kairali lunch marathons with Anish and Vinay
• Our TERRA gang- The masti, the enthu, the fighter spirit, the parties.........
• Soumya's (Medamm's) ability to understand me so well despite all my idiosyncrasies
• Rajesh's smile and silence
• Sharing all my Altus sentiments with Yedi, who always understood
• Making fun of chaks with Raghu Daa and being christened "Priyaks"
• That special bond with Neekhara sahab and our sessions in Aranya
• Ravi Singh's "enthu"
• Poo's bindaaas attitude
• Being the most active "passive smoker" at Sterling
• Weekend getaways of the ISM gang, which always resulted in some mishap
• Firangi Paani
• Madan Pub
• Utsav
• Eating some awesome food at Empire and Paramount at wee hours of the morning
• The numerous mutton sessions at my house
• The first two wonderful months of married life
• Varun's (Sadana) wierd fundaa of not drinking for 6 months of the year (though doping was allowed)
• The amazing bunch of genuine human beings at Sterling Commerce

Disclaimer: The list above is totally random and not in any order of importance!! :)

Jawani Mix.....

On August 8th, Team Terra finally clinched the Altus trophy after having lost it by a whisker on the past two occasions. This was one of my happiest moments at my present company, as my team won (finally!) before I leave. For the uninitiated, Altus is the umbrella under which a series of cultural events are organized over a period of 6-8 months at my present company . All employees are randomly distributed such that they belong to one of the six teams (Aqua, Terra, Lamina, Ventus, Ignis, Itis) which compete for the coveted Altus trophy!

This years Altus concluded with the Music Video Competition. Entertainment and masala being team Terra's forte, we decided to take some cues from the recently released Dasavatharam where Kamal Hassan performed 10 roles. The only catch- given the time and technical constraints at office we could handle only 4.

Our video was titled Jawani Mix (as the blog suggests) and can be viewed here!

Statutory warning: Some might find the video vulgar and senseless! Just like most Govinda movies, please don't apply logic- it will spoil the fun ;-)

What's with a name?

So while M is busy figuring out ways to change her last name, destiny had this in store for me!!It so happened that, while I was getting married, my colleagues at work had other plans. They decided to change my name.....removed my name plate...and instead scribbled "my name" + "M's last name" , with a piece of pen, in the name plate slot.

While I was away on a recent holiday, my super dilligent office staff assumed that I seriously wanted a name change and this was my way of suggesting the same. Without any confirmation from me or anyone in my team, they decided to go ahead and present me a brand new name plate!!

This goof-up, however, has provided me an excellent souvenier towards the end of a highly memorable stint at my present company. This is one memoriblia which will always stay with me, and bring a smile to my face whenever I see it.

Maa Tujhe Salaam....

It is 12:07 am IST (Indian Standard Time) and a friend pings me on IM…..”Maa Tujhe Salaam”. Today is 15th August 2008- 61st year of India’s independence.

This is the first Independence Day of my life when I am not in the country…and I guess this is the reason I am posting a blog on the occasion and suddenly this day feels more special than ever.

I am in Singapore for some time to meet my wife. This is my first day here…and guess what? This experience has already started helping me understand myself better- philosophy huh! Well for the starters, Singapore is a beautiful country. Very well organized, excellent transportation system, clean roads, well mannered people, and a system in place for almost everything. But, don’t know why, all this felt very robotic to me. Suddenly a thought popped up in my mind…Where’s the chaos?

WTF! I have always hated the traffic in Bangalore, the rowdiness of the Auto waalas in Chennai, the “show-off’s” in Delhi, and the chaos of Mumbai. And here I am, in a country sans all this, and I am already missing the madness back home. The noise, the interest of complete strangers in your daily affairs, the honking on the roads, people doing general bakchodi (useless talk?) etc etc etc.

So I have come to the conclusion that without the daily dose of hoch-poch in my life, I can never be completely in bliss.

At this point in time, I really feel like humming a song from the movie Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani….a song which is a personal favourite and whose lyrics I really believe in.

Hum logon ko samajh sako to samjho dilbar jaani

Jitna bhi tum samjhoge utni hogi hairaani

Apni chhatri tumko dedein kabhi jo barse paani
Kabhi naye packet mein bechein tumko cheez puraani
Phir bhi dil hai Hindustani….

Thode anari hain thode khiladi

Ruk rukke chalti hai apni gaadi

Humein pyaar chahiye

Aur kuch paise bhi

Hum aise bhi hain

Hum hain vaise bhi

Hum logon ko samajh sako to samjho dilbar jaani

Ulti seedhi jaisi bhi hai apni yehi kahaani

Thodi hummein khushiyaan bhi hain

Thodi hai nadaani

Thodi hum mein sachchaai hai

Thodi beimaani

Phir bhi dil hai Hindustani….

Aankhon mein kuchh aansoo hain kuchh sapne hain

Aansoo aur sapne donon hi apne hain

Dil dukha hai lekin... toota to nahin hai

Umeed ka daaman... choota to nahin hai

Hum logon ko samajh sako to samjho dilbar jaani

Thodi majboori hai lekin thodi hai manmaani

Thodi tu tu main main hai aur thodi kheecha taani

Hum mein kaafi baatein hain jo lagti hain deewani

Phir bhi dil hai Hindustani….

Chala Murari Hero Banane........

Apart from other great opportunities, my current company has every now and then provided me a platform to keep my creative juices flowing. I say flowing because, more often than not, a few years out of college are enough to subside all your enthu.

In February 2007 I actually got a chance, together with some highly talented colleagues, to make a short movie and act in it too! And was it an experience!

Thirty years down the line, I might not have very many interesting stories to tell from my professional life, but I will always have something to boast about from those cherishable experiences whilst making our movie.

For the curious one's, here is Main Mera Manager Aur Woh . Happy viewing! Please feel free to leave comments- if any!

Ek woh din bhi thhe..........

ek yeh din bhi hai........

ek woh raat thi........

ek yeh raat hai......

raat yeh bhee guzar jaaegi......

raat yeh bhee guzar jaaegi......

Today while digging through some old photographs I stumbled upon the one above- published in Hindustan Times many blue moons ago. Suddenly, vivid memories from the past are flashing in front of my eyes as I am humming this song written by Gulzar.

This may sound cliched, but those really were the best days of my life :)

A lot has changed between then and now. Like? Well.....my weight, my hairstyle, my martial status, my outlook towards life, my misery(yes!!)...... etc etc. And then, there are somethings which time has not succeeded in changing - my friend circle (barring a few additions), my energy, my non-stop speaking, my quest for information (read gossip!), my fighter spirit, and my mood swings.

There were struggles then and there are struggles now. Just that the definition of struggle has changed a bit.

I was happy then and I am happy now. Just that the definition of happiness has changed a bit.

I used to write then(diary) and I write now (diary+blog). Just that the medium of expression has changed a bit.

And before I completely loose track of what I am writing.....here is a toast to life- Cheers!

To friends getting hitched......

Sometimes you are aware and yet choose to be blissfully ignorant. Circumstances force you to keep your trap shut. So was the case with me for a while now......till Harry met Sally.

I simultaneously went through three emotions when the news was broken at Firangi Paani (a pub in Bangalore).

• "Wow! It was always meant to be"
• "WTF! Why didn't she let me know earlier, despite those several indirect hints?"
• "Boy, am I smart? I always knew!"

The third one, of-course, was a big ego booster :) Moreover, the news couldn't have come at a better time- a day before my birthday!

Don't know what future beholds for the new found lovers, but this is wishing them all the very best for the journey ahead.

Disclaimer: The title of this blog is inspired from minimousya's blog!

Missing Her......

Bangalore suddenly feels quiet and empty. M has left, and she is gone for good. She has made me proud and ecstatic by her achievements. Achievements which she never desired......after all everyone is not driven by the same priorities in life.

If it was up to her, she wouldn't have even taken this step (a major decision on our part) and left. It was me who pushed for it really hard and I have no regrets. There is satisfaction, like never experienced before,....and yet there is the emptiness. Every nook and corner of the house (and my heart) is craving for her presence.

The next 18 months will be tough. But I know we will steer through, overcoming all challenges. But at this point, the only thing on my mind is to hear her voice as soon as her flight lands.

This song, I guess, best describes my state of mind. Sometimes it feels it was custom composed for our situation :)

De Taali....Taali De....

Saw De Taali yesterday with maa and M. Apart from the title song being really hummable and catchy, following are my comments:

Aftab Shivdasani: Yeh hero kaise, kab, aur kyon banaa?? Isko hero kaa role kaun aur kyon offer kartaa hai? He is one actor who has survived in the industry for quite sometime now giving the same expression for every emotion known to mankind!

Ritesh Deshmukh: Uber cool! This guy is so damn smooth on screen. There is not one film of his in which I have not liked his performance (yet!)

Ayesha Takia: Chubby atom bomb! She is one of the few actresses in bollywood who has some "Meat" on her. She is hot!

As far as the movie is concerned- nothing spectacular. It is one of those films which is neither good nor bad. Just sit for 2 hours in an air conditioned hall and enjoy the few good moments while sleeping through the rest!

Restroom...huh?

I had been wanting to right this post for a very long time. It is something which has been on my mind for a while now.

When I was in school, I distinctly remember using the term "Toilet" for the place we visited often to part ourselves from all the water we drank from our waterbottles (and sometimes the tiffin which we ate!). I am sure all of us remember using the term "Maam, may I go to the toilet please?"

At home, "Bathroom" it always was.

Time flied by or what..... when I joined my first company there were sign posts all over the place pointing to "Restrooms". Wow! I thought. I have chosen the perfect company to work- they have rooms for employees to actually rest. I hardly knew that I was in for the shock of my life.

Toilet-->Bathroom-->Restroom, they are all the same.

Like most human beings, driven by societal pressure, I make it a point to address Bathroom/Toilet as Restroom in public arena- "Which way is the Restroom please?"

Would appreciate if someone could point out if it was always Restroom for them or I am the only dumb ass around here?

Threadless

I was reading an article today.....and I just got lost. Lost in a world where ideas rule the roost...where people think beyond the routine....where youngsters dream and have the courage to live their dream.

I started wondering about the immense potential the web has in general and the numerous untapped business opportunities waiting to be unearthed by Indian entrepreneurs. Frankly speaking, compared to the countries of the west, Japan, even China...we are way behind as far as using Internet as a platform to implement successful business ideas is concerned.

The more I read about successful web-based business ventures, the more I realize that starting a successful web-based business is more about the innovation, than about the technology. You can either find a gap in people's life and try to fill it or just think of something weird and crazy, yet having the potential to become a rage, and implement it. Trust me (though I am no authority on entrepreneurship!) , if you have the idea, technology will never be an hindrance. Today, there are so many tools and vendors available at highly reasonable or no cost (depending on the level of technical expertise required) that you don't have to be highly tech savvy to take the web route to starting a successful business.

What's stopping you then?

Back to Blogging

It has been 1 year and 4 months since my last blog. Not that I am a rage in the blogger world and people were desperately waiting for my post [:P]........but it feels good to be back!

Why have I been away this long? My name (Matiaoo) suggests it all. Matiaao, simply put, means......lazy. I started blogging in Nov 2005- and this is my 16th post. This makes it nearly 6 posts a year.....man I am lazy!

A friend of mine has started blogging today and I felt that this is the apt time to revive my blog as well. Will try to post more frequently from now on......let's see how long am I able to sustain it.

Cheers to blogging!!